Once upon a time, you were your wife’s knight in shining armor. One look at her and you knew that your relationship was meant to be (and that she felt the same.) Fast-forward a few years…is it the same now that life has set-in? Work, kids and stressors of daily life are enough to take a toll on even the strongest of relationships. You have to keep working each day to win your wife’s heart – to keep your knight status in her eyes. Here are some great ideas on how to win your wife’s heart.
How to Win Your Wife’s Heart
Know How to Listen
I’ve found in my relationship with Carlie that there’s a difference between listening and listening. When something’s really on her mind and she needs to talk, my mind can’t be on the game, what’s going on at work or what I need to get done once the kids are in bed. I have to be fully immersed in our conversation. And believe me, there is no fooling her. I make a point of letting her talk and offering enough feedback to let her know that our talk is important to me (without taking over the discussion.)
Don’t Try to Fix Everything
This one has taken me a long time to get. As a guy, we want to fix things. It’s hard to see her hurting or frustrated. As much as that may seem the thing to do, sometimes she just needs me to support her; to listen to her vent or rant about what’s making her upset without trying to fix it. Rather than offering solutions all the time, just listening and letting her know that you hear her and support her is often what she needs.
Show Her that She’s on Your Mind
Another bonus to being married as long as I have been is that I know what makes her tick. I know that she hates cleaning the expanse of tile floor and, after a day homeschooling our kids she just needs to get out. So I work hard to think of ways that I can make her happy. Revving up the old steam mop, sending quick emails or texts during the day or suggesting that she go to a coffee shop to read while I take care of things at home helps her to see that, though our days are busy, I’m still thinking of her and want to make her happy.
Find Ways to Reduce Her Stress
In a day and age when most couples have both husband and wife working, there is plenty of cause for stress. In addition to the responsibilities at work, both of us have things that have to get done at home. I know that Carlie feels especially responsible for tasks at home, plus she works from home and does a fantastic job raising (and educating) our kids. Once I recognized the sources of her stress, I was able to find ways that I could step in to help relieve some of it. By taking the kids on errands after work, for example, I’m able to free her up for some of her other tasks…or to have some much-needed time to herself.
Keep Her in the Loop
If you’re like me, every day is a crazy one. Between meetings at work and things at home, I don’t have much time where I’m not running. I sometimes take for granted that Carlie knows what I’m thinking. Taking a step back and really thinking about if I’ve talked with her about my goals, what’s going on at work and what my thoughts are about our family helps me to be sure that she knows what’s on my mind. If I realize that we haven’t talked about it in awhile, we plan a time to chat once the kids are in bed.
Do you know of other ways that you can win your wife’s heart? Please share your thoughts.
More to Consider…