The dating system today would tell you that it’s okay to date around, push boundaries, and possibly go all the way and leave with no strings attached. However, if you’re a single Christian, then this dating system is nothing more than a trap to get you to sin. Without going into too much detail, real dating is a system designed to foster romance by getting to know another person on a deep and intimate level. In your singleness, you can certainly date; however, we strongly suggest that you take this precious time to learn seven valuable lessons for Christian singles that will undoubtedly bless your future union with your spouse.
7 Must-Learn Lessons for Christian Singles
Before diving in, go ahead and bookmark this page, save the pin to your favorite “Christian singles” Pinterest board, and grab your journal because what you’re about to read is going to bless your socks off!
You must learn how to truly love yourself.
I can’t tell you how many women who have been married for five, ten, even fifteen years realize that the foundation to a lot of their issues in marriage revolves around them not truly loving themselves. You see, we all have our own baggage, no matter how much or how little.
Most of us can admit that within that baggage are little pieces of insecurity branching from some childhood trauma or high school girl drama. Add to that the voices of the world saying that you need to look and act a certain way. Instead, spend time learning what God says about you and who He says you are.
Scriptures to consider memorizing and studying: Psalm 139:13-16; Galatians 4:7; Isaiah 62:3-5; John 3:16
Learn how to truly forgive yourself.
Going hand-in-hand with the last tip, a certain amount of baggage may also have some regret and unforgiveness. This is another area that is typically swept under the rug and carried around as if it has to stay. On the contrary, not truly dealing with your past and forgiving yourself can cause a major hindrance in your future marriage.
In some cases, you may need to speak with a counselor or seek deliverance, but regardless of what you choose, steps should be made to get to a positive where you are living truly free of doubt, regret, and unforgiveness.
Scriptures to consider memorizing and studying: 2 Corinthians 5:17; Romans 8:1-2; John 8:36; Colossians 1:13
Lessons for Christian Singles
Learn how to stand strong on God’s promises.
As a single Christian, seasons can come when God’s promises seem further away and much harder to believe. It’s important to know the promises found in His word because they hold the key to walking into the blessing of your future marriage covenant.
We can be thankful that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever and that His word remains ever so true. We are also told that His word does not return void, making declaring and decreeing it very important. Getting into the habit of studying His word and standing on it now will help you carry this act into your marriage. You’ll already have the “muscle memory” of standing on His word when things in marriage seem less than pleasant.
Scriptures to consider memorizing and studying: Psalm 119:89-91; Philippians 4:1-2; Psalm 100:5; 2 Samuel 7:28
Learn how to delight yourself in the Lord.
The Scriptures say that when you delight yourself in the Lord, he will give you the desires of your heart. When you learn how to take delight in the Lord, as well as in the season you’re in, He is faithful to give you the desires of your heart. You can take courage in knowing that He has your every need in mind and He will be faithful to meet them.
Scriptures to consider memorizing and studying: Psalm 37:4; Psalm 46:10; Psalm 34:4; Romans 8:28
Learn how to keep your motives in check.
Sometimes when you’re single and desperately wanting to find a significant other, motives can become skewed. With a skewed perspective, it paves the way for compromise. This can look many different ways but a few most common ones are:
- Dating multiple people simultaneously.
- Pushing your boundary line.
- Dating people who are unequally yoked.
When you are constantly present and on guard about your motives, ensuring they are pure at all times, it becomes much easier for the enemy to tempt you to pursue someone beyond a godly desire.
Scriptures to consider memorizing and studying: Proverbs 21:2; Galatians 1:10; 1 Timothy 1:5; Proverbs 16:2
As a single Christian, learn how to guard your moral purity.
Guarding your moral purity will take just as much planning as if you were going on a one-week vacation to Disney (and we all know how much planning that takes!). Moral purity is something that should be taken seriously and guarded at all costs as it comes with some high spiritual repercussions.
Through scripture, we are charged to stay pure not only for God but also for ourselves and our future spouse. Linked to impurities are things such as the illusion of personal intimacy, confusion, guilt, disease, and defilement. You can save yourself (and your future spouse) precious time and experiences by standing guard now.
Scriptures for memorizing and studying: 1 Corinthians 6:18-20; 1 Corinthians 7:1-5; Psalm 119:9; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5; Galatians 5:19-21
More Lessons for Christian Singles
Learn how to study and develop godly character traits.
To give you another practical example of how this works in other areas of life… when you shop for a new car, chances are you want to learn everything you can about a particular vehicle. The same can be applied for you in your singleness. It is just as important to learn about the qualities of a godly woman and man. By doing so, you will dodge relationships that are unhealthy and also prepare yourself to be a future godly spouse.
Scriptures for memorizing and studying: Proverbs 31:30; Galatians 5:22-23; Romans 12:2; Colossians 3:12-15
As you navigate your journey of singleness, keep these lessons in mind. Don’t see them as something negative or not worth going through, as they have the potential to set you up for a marriage that is everything you dreamed of and more!